Deonn Ritchie's Impractical Guide to Moving
Countdown-30 days until the move.

Goal
Today I decided I would spend the evening packing up books. I would go to Staples and by some boxes. I would keep the books that were really special to me and donate the ones that I have been hauling around for years.

Reality
Drank half a bottle of merlot at the Sand Point Grill. Staples is closed now.

- posted by Deonn @ 12/30/2004 11:34:00 PM

 
"Jesus Rocks!"
My downstairs neighbor has a huge poster on his wall that says "Jesus Rocks!"
Does Jesus have to rock? Can't he just...be? or not be? Whatever your beliefs may be. I mean it's a lot of pressure just being lord and savior to billions of people does he really need the added pressure of needing to be hip? I'm sure all he wants is just to have a low-key birthday, hanging out with his peeps, maybe a little karoake...but none of this "Jesus Rocks" crap. Happy Birthday Jesus. Don't let your friends trick you into singing anything by Flock of Seagulls.



- posted by Deonn @ 12/24/2004 07:09:00 AM

 
Merry MeX-mas
I have recently purchased tickets to see El Vez. Armed with a burning curiosity and a willing accomplice I will be seeing the Mexican Elvis next Thursday night! I didn't know much about him so I decided to do my research. He will be performing at the Showbox as part of his Merry MeX-mas tour. Songs from his album "Sno-Way Jose" include, Mamacita Donde Esta Santa Claus?, Poncho Claus, and Brown Christmas. Check out his groovy website. http://elvez.net/evFrameset.html.

Here are some other Elvises...Elvi that I have come across since beginning my research.

Melvis-The Jewish Elvis Impersonator-His repertoire includes "Blue Suede Jews" and "Don't be Cruel...To a small white jew"

Jelvis the Kosher King-A picture is worth 1000 words. http://www.beliefnet.com/frameset_offsite.asp?pageloc=http://www.jewishelvis.com/&query=&script=/story/107/story_10740_1.html

Elvis Herselvis-The Lesbian Elvis Impersonator

Evangelistic Elvis- He's all about the Jesusness.

Texas Elvis Explosion-?

Hunka Burnin Elvi- (Elvi is the accepted plural form)

Elvis Chan-Chinese Elvis

Elvis Gauthier-The French Language Elvis

Extreme Elvis-JR saw Extreme Elvis in person. I was unfortunate enough to see the video. Extreme Elvis is as his name implies, I personally am not a fan of Giant naked men singing elvis tunes while sticking things in various orifices. But who am I to judge. He also has an extremely small penis. I'm not talking small, I'm talking "Hedwig and the Angry Inch" could be adapted to "Elvis and the really Pissed of .5 centimeter"

Deaf Elvis-Spanish Deaf impersonator Tom Gaetano, all songs are performed in ASL

Deaf Elvis 2- Not to be one-upped, Art Kistler is deaf and blind, "top that Deaf Elvis #1!"

Tone Deaf Elvis-That's not his actual name. Only an angry nickname given in a letter of complaint to a local casino.

Elvis Phung-Actually Vietnamese, he performs his own versions of Elvis songs at a Chinese Restaurant in London. His Hits include "Are you Dim Sum Tonight" and "Jailhouse Wok"

Perhaps I'm in the wrong business. Maybe I should give up the glitz and glamour of children's theatre and try my hand at Elvis. I'll have to come up with a catchy name. Any suggestions? (Elvis Phung is already taken)


- posted by Deonn @ 12/09/2004 08:30:00 PM

 
Sweet Cuppincakes!
I have a new favorite place! Think of the dumbest idea for a restaurant (besides Taco del Mar) and you have my new favorite place. No not Butch's Bar-B-Que and Mattresses, or Typhoid Mary's Tea Room. How about a place that sells pretty much just cupcakes?

Ballard has it's share of offbeat businesses. I have mostly frequented Archie McPhee's, The Nordic Heritage Museum and that funky Flag Shop. I scoffed when I first saw Cupcakes Royale, it is also the home of Verite Coffee. I assumed the Seattle clientele was too sophisticated for a cupcake shop. I assumed the goatee-ed, bespectacled, heavily pierced post grungers were there with their laptops sipping Black coffee here because they did not want to support the mega monsters of the neighboring Tully's and Starbucks. I couldn't imagine the dred locked patchouli spiced hippy dude, slidin up to the counter for a Vanilla Butter cake deluxe with Purple buttercream frosting. I left Ballard without trying out Cupcakes Royale, laughing it off as a ridiculous idea. I mean, I like a good cupcake as much as the next gal, but come on an entire place dedicated to cupcakes!?

Last Friday night around 10:00pm, We were looking for something to do. We were in Ballard. We had already had dinner, Weren't in the mood for bar hopping...yet. Kurt and Marie had free babysitting, Dennis suggested Cupcakes Royale. I laughed when he told me that he had been there before. He told me that people weren't there for the coffee, they were there in fact for the cupcake. Everyone who went there had a cupcake. Partly because I didn't believe him, Partly because the novelty of it and Partly because...well I do love a good cupcake, we decided to give it a try. After all Ballard is the World Headquarters. It said so in the window.
Okay Dennis was right. Everyone had a cupcake! It's hard to describe the scene. Baby Boomers mixed with teenagers, retirees and twentysomethings, bikers, a green haired guy and intellectuals with their laptops. They all had a cupcake!

There was nothing left to do but have one myself. They all had fun, extremely girly names, we read them in "the Official Guide to Cupcaking!" names like Barbie, Bunny, Ballerina and Lemon Drop. My personal favorite was the Dance party with Holly Hobby. I guess Sugar High Sky Blue, Pastel Purgatory and Diabetic Coma didn't make the cut. Kurt and I both had the pink coconut "Bunny" I believe Dennis had the Purple Ballerina and Marie determined to just share Kurt's, broke down and bought "The Classic" My cupcake was pretty much fabulous. "What a great idea for a business I thought", briefly remembering dragging Gina by it only weeks earlier saying "What a stupid idea for a business." How naive I once was...how naive. I know better now.
...and...there's a great bar just down the street.

Check out http://cupcakeroyale.com

- posted by Deonn @ 12/06/2004 11:31:00 PM

 
Demon Rickshaw
If I took the spell check's suggestion for my name it would be Demon.
Demon Rickshaw.
Spell check has many suggestions for my middle name, Tarese.
I think my favorite is Trashy.
Perhaps I should adopt a new stage name.
Demon Trashy Rickshaw.
It has a nice ring to it.
I'd better go change my business cards.

- posted by Deonn @ 12/06/2004 12:28:00 AM